Take inspiration from the research showing that cigarette smokers increase their odds of quitting with every (even failed) attempt.
Instead of “resolving” – review. What did you resolve in 2014? 2010? 1999? My guess is something pretty close to what you’re planning to change in the future.
This year, skip the plan.
Want to be less disorganized, thinner, richer, healthier? In a new relationship, out of an old one? In a new job? A new house?
None of these things change unless you do. And it’s not just a behavioural change. It’s a fundamental one.
Alcoholics who get sober frequently become food or exercise addicts. Food addicts on a diet often overspend. Any real recovery requires uncovering the root of your problem.
Generally, it’s a need to self-medicate pain or dodge discomfort.
So why aren’t you comfortable in your own skin?
Resolve only to learn this:
How do I become “comfortable in my own skin”?
Try three questions:
How can I know what I don’t know?
Who holds the pain of my self-doubt?
How has failing to change served me or those around me?
Then make a plan to assemble a winning team; a coach and fellow players who will inspire & guide you while training by your side every step of the way.
There are some excellent self-help books to help you begin the process of unearthing your obstacles to change.
“Living Your Best Life” (Fortgang) is a great way to dive in. You’ll have no difficulty reading it over the holidays – and if you take the exercises seriously you will be well on your way.
Next step – choose a team!
Think about it. If you have surrounded yourself with the same people for years and you haven’t been able to make significant changes in your life – perhaps it is because in any system – we all return to the status quo.
There are networks, meetings and classes everywhere. Plan to take in at least one new event a month. Make a few of them classes.
Already going to yoga? Try a different class at a different time. You might meet a new best friend there. Like your gym? Take a session at another – you don’t know whom you might meet.
Ever hear of “laughter yoga” – no exercise involved – but be prepared to leave happily inspired.
Business network comfortably familiar? Other networks welcome visitors – don’t commit – just take a chance on a meeting.
Change is hard. Small steps matter!
Adopt a mantra for 2015: “I love and accept myself the way that I am today, I am enough”.
The miracle of acceptance is that as you come to believe this, by 2016 your life will have changed. For the better!