On spending time with positive people…

Tangible logoI spent three days last week chairing and participating in the Tangible Ireland Summer School. It was interesting, challenging, heartening, stimulating and fun! It also reminded me, in a very tangible way (forgive the word play) of the inestimable value of spending time around positive people. Bear in mind that when I say “positive”, I do not mean rose spectacled Pollyanna types who are relentlessly cheerful no matter what the circumstances. For me, positive people are those who consistently look for, and focus on, solutions to whatever problems or challenges they encounter.

So it was that over the course of three days I had glimpses into the numerous ways people are working to help others achieve more of their potential. Be that through leadership with Anthony McCann, Empowerment with Eve Earley or culture change with Eoin Barry. I was heartened by Catherina Casey’s story of success and new challenges in connecting the global Irish through our shared cultural heritage and by Brian O’Boyce’s perspective on some of the excellence within our health services. I was intrigued by Gerry O’Sullivan’s story of a Limerick man in the Shanghai police…perhaps enough to buy the book! I was grounded by Stephen McNulty’s focus on the numbers and Robert Baker’s analysis of the opportunities out there. I was inspired by Chris Gordon’s ideas, passion and energy and by John Webb O’Rourke’s relentless drive and positive focus in the face of obstacles. I was called to action by Donagh McKeown and his timely initiative to encourage all of us to talk about mental well being. And to finish it all off Alan Gallagher showed us how we can all play our part with passion, positivity and connections to the global Irish network.

So I am celebrating my good fortune to have (or create) opportunities to spend time around other positive people and I am reminded of the value of this to my own mental wellbeing. Of course I can’t claim that this is a new insight, indeed I know it so well that it features on my essential tool kit! Nonetheless it is an insight worth refreshing on a regular basis and, after last weeks interactions I am certainly facing into September thoroughly refreshed!

Conway logo

originally posted 28 Aug 2013 14:04 by Carol Conway




The Artist’s Way & The Prosperous Heart

Sustaining change in life and work is hard. Groups of like minded people keep you focused and on track as you go through The Artist’s Way.

Explore a disciplined approach to effecting a real life change,  rediscover and engage your most creative self.

Join us for a free introductory session, twelve week groups will then commence in late September/October 2013.

The Artist’s Way

the-artists-wayDublin  @ The Howth Yacht Club
Tuesday evenings 

Tuesday morning location tbd

Belfast, @ The Source Wellbeing Centre

Thursday evenings 

Thursday morning location tbd

 

 

smallest pros heart

The Prosperous Heart

Newry @ The Bath House

Monday, evenings

Carlingford, @ Saddle View
Sundays, 11:00am

For more information or to
register interest, contact us.

 




Tools for Life

Once again I find I have slipped in my commitment to a weekly blog. That’s not like me, the next time I’ll set time aside on a regular basis to write lively, informative and relevant posts weekly.

I start with that admission of failure and commitment to change because I spent a good portion of this week sharing what I know about effecting change successfully with a wonderful and inspiring group of leaders participating on the Investment in Excellence programme being put on by The Wheel. As ever, the experience leaves me with a deep sense of how lucky I am to be invited to share/teach/deliver this material on a regular basis. The concepts are well proven (including by me in my own life), profound and life-changing and they also require a level of rigour and self-discipline that at times can be challenging to sustain. In that regard, I benefit hugely every time I deliver the material by hearing it all over again and being reminded of where I could benefit by applying it more consistently in my own life and practice.

One of the things I committed to sharing with the group was a synopsis of the Tool Kit of which I am such a fan. As I put the list together, I realised it might be worth sharing with a wider audience. And, for anyone reading this for the first time and confused by some of the shorthand, simply link back to my earlier posts (links provided) as most of the items have been written about in more detail over the last year.

So for those among you who, like me, would like a handy tool kit to use for the most important D.I.Y. job of all – creating a successful and happy life – here it is:

The Tool Kit (so far…):

1. Control my Self Talk

  • I am always positive and affirming in how I talk to myself and others
  • Avoid “can’t”, “don’t”, “but”, “just”, “only”, “have to”
  • Embrace “there is a solution, I simply haven’t seen it yet”, “I am strong, positive and cope well with adversity”, “Setbacks happen and I always bounce back stronger as a result”

2. Set Deliberate Goals

  • Reflect on what I want in life
  • Goal set with balance in all areas of my life (Balance Wheel)
  • Use the Affirmation process to write my goals correctly
  • Imprint my Affirmations daily

3. Manage my Stress

  • Be aware of my body language to myself; unclench, uncross, lift my heart, release my neck, “Hallelujah” arms daily
  • Use the Breath of Tranquility (inhale counting four, pause counting two, exhale counting four, pause counting two, repeat) to trigger the Relaxation Response
  • Use a shield visualisation (light or strong perspex) to protect myself from perceived negativity of those around me

4. Build & Strengthen my Self Esteem & Belief in the Goodness of the World

  • Use my list of ten things I do/did well to revisit previous success and imprint those in my subconscious
  • Keep a “success journal” daily of good things I have achieved or contributed to both large and small. Wallow in that success and enjoy appreciating my own achievements privately to imprint excellence as a habit
  • Build an attitude of gratitude, noticing and feeling thankful for the good things that happen daily, both large and small

And finally, spend as much time around other positive people as you can. Optimism and positivity are contagious (as are negativity, pessimism and misery) so let’s start the right kind of epidemic!

Originally posted 24 Sep 2011




Claiming your Adulthood

  • “30 is not the new 20,
  • Claim your adulthood,
  • Get some “identity capital”,
  • Use your “weak ties”,
  • Pick your family,
  • Don’t be defined by what you didn’t know or didn’t do,
  • You are deciding your life right now”,

In an incredibly powerful talk Meg Jay succinctly explains why our twenties are and for my peers were – the defining decade of our lives.

The developmental surge from 0-5 when we develop language and attachments is well understood. Sadly, as a culture we trivialize what she describes as “the defining decade of adulthood”.

“Claiming your twenties is one of the simplest most transformative things you can do.”

yourjourneyWhat does this mean for me at near 60 or you in your 30’s and 40’s?

It explains a lot. It prepares you to understand what choices then have impacted your life now – and what habits, thought processes and even friends you need to jettison.

  • Are you ready to claim your life?
  • To let go the excuse of “victimhood”?
  • To begin living intentionally?

Get in touch!

September groups are forming in Dublin, Belfast & Newry/Dundalk to support your personal change management process.

 “The Defining Decade:Why Your Twenties Matter”, Meg Jay




Association and Affiliation

I find the thing I miss the most about work in a traditional office is colleagues. The discipline of work is hard outside of “9 to 5” but manageable. It is the absence of the “water cooler” – that’s the loss. The conversations started randomly, the overheard snippets that trigger an idea, the laughter that evokes the smile that changes a mood.

Today I am grateful for gratitude. Julia Cameron, author of The Artist’s Way – published a new book in 2009. Finding Water; The Art of Perseverance is a worthy companion for anyone’s journey – but before you dive into the contents – note the acknowledgements page. It is a testament to how she has persevered. The list format, powerful in its length and simplicity reads:

Elizabeth Cameron, for her commitment; Sara Carder, for her care; Carolina Casperson, for her daring – almost thirty names – a full page in alphabetical order.  Each honours life-giving energy given and modelled by the people she chooses to share her life. They include vision, generosity, fortitude, loyalty, belief, insight, inspiration, guidance, enthusiasm, shepherding, strength and clarity.

My challenge today is to write such a list and acknowledge those people and their gifts in my life. That done I am reminded that the real challenge of this day is to be present; to choose to associate and affiliate with people who live well and model the daring, grit, wisdom, perseverance or calm I need to learn and relearn every day.